ParshaRx: The Resentment Rewind

This week in Parshat Korach, we meet a man who sparks a rebellion—but what he’s really doing is replaying an old wound.

Korach challenges Moshe and Aharon by claiming, “The entire assembly is holy—why are you lifting yourselves above everyone else?”

But this wasn’t about justice. It was about jealousy. About feeling unchosen.

And instead of processing that pain, Korach built a narrative, recruited allies, and tried to destroy the very thing he wanted to be part of.

That’s resentment.

Resentment is what happens when we mentally replay a hurt again and again.

The word itself tells you what’s going on: re-sent-ment.

You’re re-sending the pain in your own mind. Not in theirs. Not in real time. In you.

As Rashi teaches, Korach was driven by jealousy.

The Sfas Emes says he lacked the bitul, the humility to question his own assumptions.

And as Rabbi Abraham Twerski put it: “The venom of resentment poisons its container more than its target.”

We all do this. We expect others to meet unspoken needs. And when they don’t—we stew.

In recovery circles, we say: Expectations are premeditated resentments.

And now—right now—we're entering Rosh Chodesh Tammuz, the gateway into the most fragile time on the Jewish calendar.

From now until the 9th of Av, it’s a season historically filled with loss, pain and grief.

The Kabbalists call this mochin d’katnut—constricted consciousness.

Which means: we’re more sensitive, more reactive, more prone to being triggered.

This is prime resentment season.

So what’s the ParshaRx this week?

Ask yourself:

- What am I re-sending in my head?

- Is the person I’m upset with even aware of it?

- What part of me just wants to feel seen, held, acknowledged?

And most importantly:

What grudge am I willing to lay down—just a little?

Let go of the resentment—not even because they deserve it, but because you do.

Because holding on keeps you stuck. Because it keeps the pain alive.

And if it feels impossible to stop the loop? Ask me about Brainspotting—it’s one of the most powerful tools I’ve seen for rewiring those old loops in the brain.

As our sages teach, the Beis Hamikdash was destroyed because of sinat chinam—baseless hatred.

And it hasn’t been rebuilt because we're still holding onto our grudges.

This Rosh Chodesh and this Shabbat, may we soften our grip on the stories we keep resending.

Even loosening it a little can begin the healing.

And if enough of us do this—truly do this—maybe this year, the 9th of Av won’t be a day of mourning, but a day of dancing.